Checking In

...with myself.

Writing. Is not coming as easily right now.

I can justify it is because I'm busy. Again.

I am writing. Just not as much as I want or when I want.

picture from Utne Reader

Words. Piling up. Words. The flow isn't happening because I don't have the blocks of time.

Interpreting performances. Teaching. Interpreting a play. Working.

Going to appointments because of the work. So I don't hurt, so I can do the work to pay the bills for doing the work. There's something not quite right in that.

Spiral.

Writing.

The posts here lag. I notice. I notice again.

I did go to a dance performance last Saturday. Just me. A world premiere - a commissioned piece. Some of it was incredible and I was moved and my attention was wholly on the stage. A few times my thoughts wandered and I didn't feel connected. Overall - it was really good. And I was glad I went.

I've been doing more swimming. And more walking. And getting enough sleep.

But very little "veg" time. I need more.

Words. I made the deadline for one story. The other is still incomplete; partly due to technical conflicts, partly - time escaped me this week. I'm hoping to wrap that one up and submit it after work tonight.

Words. Waiting to be written and revised.

Words.

Word.

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Happy Birthday, Virginia Woolf - Jan. 25th

Virginia Woolf

Born Adeline Virginia Stephens

1882-1941

There are numerous websites and books and articles about Virginia Woolf. Her contribution to literature, to feminism, to the desire for time and space for women writers. I'll let you look that up on your own.

Instead, I want to take this opportunity to say thank you to some of the women writers I've written with and been inspired by and received feedback from over the years. And I'm not talking about dead ones, because there are many of them; or the ones I've only read their works but never met ... but I am talking about the ones I've actually met in this life.

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For my current proliferation of writing, the accumulation of short stories and the completed memoir/creative nonfiction (now in editing mode), as well as increased confidence and a stronger voice, a big thank you to Ariel Gore. She is one bad ass writer and she is an outstanding instructor, facilitator, with incredible feedback and editing skills. Thank you for the inspirations and prompts and years of being an excellent role model, writer, and friend.

For unconditional support and belief in me as a writer, Bonnie Hearn Hill. Also a great writer with some great series and individual books, as well as years of experience. Thank you for being there, Bonnie, and reconnecting. And for taking the long train ride to Stockton and our unintentional walk through the wild side of town.

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As I begin writing this, I realize the list is long, There are some whom I know primarily through their writing, but had an occasion or two to take a workshop with - such as Natalie Goldberg - and to hear them read, as well - such as Judith Barrington.

There are organizers, trainers, and facilitators I've worked with in other capacities. Such as the women at Write Around Portland - Dawn, Beth, Robyn, Sara - some of whom have moved on to other projects or organizations; they were all inspiration to writing in community and opening up the definition of community - giving access to anyone with a desire to write. All excellent role models for becoming a better facilitator and giving feedback. As well as each of them being a skilled writer in her own right.

There are and have been some incredible writers in the Literary Kitchen over the years I've been doing the online writing classes/workshops - and the in-person versions, as well. So many women - and men - in the Kitchen that I can't possibly name them all and know I'd forget some people if I even tried. Some of the other Wayward Writers are local - and we've had face-to-face writing time. Everyone in the Kitchen and the Facebook lounge - awesome. And Inga Muscio who is currently pushing us in new directions in our writing in a special Literary Kitchen "Decerebralization" online class. Thank you.

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Just thank you. For being you. For being a writer. For being there with and for other writers.
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Mars Goes Retrograde - thanks, Hazel!

Hazel Dixon-Cooper always has some great write-ups about retrogrades. And other things astrological. But I do notice that I tend to catch her retrograde pieces most often.

Here is a snippet of  the whole article. It's worth clicking on over to read the in-depth analysis of this period we're entering.

When any planet goes retrograde, the energy of that planet is turned inward. You get a chance to re-think, re-evaluate, and revise. With Mars, this retrograde energy gives you a chance to get in touch with your deepest desires. Add Virgo’s focus on discrimination, self-analysis, and ability to blend body and spirit, and you get a rare opportunity to make serious changes for the better.



Mars is the planet of action, and about the least introspective planet in the zodiac. Mars is aggressive, passionate, and direct. During retrograde, this wild energy is internalized. You might feel nervous, irritable (Virgo), or a little paranoid. If you’re someone who .....

You can read the piece in it's entirety at Hazel Dixon-Cooper's Astrology for You.
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Theater & Storytelling as Catalysts for Change

An email from Mike Daisey ....

Hello All,

I can't tell you how excited I am to send this email to you.

First, if you haven't heard, during this break in the run at the Public we spent a month collaborating with Ira Glass and THIS AMERICAN LIFE to adapt THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY OF STEVE JOBS for the radio.

It aired the weekend of January 6th in a special episode of THIS AMERICAN LIFE where the only story was our excerpt of the monologue adapted for the radio, followed by a discussion featuring TAL doing extensive fact checking, interviews with Chinese labor activists, and a debate between myself and Nicholas Kristoff.

You can listen to the show here:

http://tinyurl.com/8aypq8a

Apple was asked to be on the show or to respond in any way. They refused.

In its first week the episode was the most downloaded in THIS AMERICAN LIFE's history. The internet exploded, and the story went everywhere—I received over a thousand emails in just a few days; the response was overwhelming.

That same week news broke that hundreds of Foxconn workers had a stand-off that lasted two days, where they were all threatening mass suicide by throwing themselves off the roof of the plant over their working conditions.

http://tinyurl.com/7tbtoo8

This is at Foxconn, a company which Apple's own 2011 Supplier Responsibility Report said was completely up to code, and which Apple applauded for their efforts. This is the company about which Steve Jobs said the employees enjoyed a virtual paradise of movie theaters, swimming pools, and luxury.

A week after our show was broadcast, Apple made an abrupt announcement. After years of stonewalling and silence, they released the full list of their suppliers, and agreed to outside, independent monitoring of working conditions in the factories they use. It is not everything, but it is a small step down the right road.

http://tinyurl.com/6ojorxx

Many news outlets are crediting THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY OF STEVE JOBS for being a large factor in Apple's decision. I've received a number of emails from Apple employees who have told me they believe that hearing this story on THIS AMERICAN LIFE, a program many Apple employees listen to with their families and their children, created "a morale situation" that finally compelled Apple to begin to do the right thing.

I would like to thank everyone who has heard this story and then told it on to the next person. In theater we sometimes doubt that we can effect change—I think we all doubt it, sometimes. The truth is that telling stories, person to person, is the best way we have ever had of connecting to the human—and whatever this show may or may not have achieved, it has come out of the conversations happening night after night after night.

Thank you,

md

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The not so accidental writer

I thought I was still on the fence about doing the overlapping online writing workshops : Inga Muscio and Ariel Gore simultaneously? Could I really do it.

Did I want to? Easy A: yes! Would I have the time? Unknown. And the money? I could make it work.

I debated whether I would be setting myself up for failure. For overload or overwhelm.

I thought I'd say no.

Then I received the email to all of the Wayward Writers that I was on the list for the next section. Time to pay up (my words, not Ariel's) and I remembered that I had said I'd do it, I thought.

So I did.

Inga's workshop/class started two weeks ago and Ariel's starts this Saturday.

And Monday I interpret live, unscripted storytelling. And next Thursday I interpret "The North Plan" at Portland Center Stage (see the show if you're local - it's funny, it's revolutionary, it's a good night's escape. Then I'll shift my prep focus to Vagina Monologues - which we're interpreting on 2/11 at Portland Community College.

And I'm teaching.

And doing my other interpreting.

And two writing workshops.

This is going to be fun. And I'm serious.
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Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

SOPA & PIPA

There is a lot of other information out there on what is happening.

This particular link is Google's petition.

There are others. This is just the one that caught my attention today.

The other tagline I've seen which I like is

Keep the Internet Free

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Quote: If You're Serious About Writing

photo from The Memoir Writing Club

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"I believe that – if you are serious about a life of writing, or indeed about any creative form of expression – that you should take on this work like a holy calling. I became a writer the way other people become monks or nuns. I made a vow to writing, very young. I became Bride-of-Writing. I was writing’s most devotional handmaiden. I built my entire life around writing. I didn’t know how else to do this. I didn’t know anyone who had ever become a writer. I had no, as they say, connections. I had no clues. I just began."

~ Elizabeth Gilbert

Thank you, Jessica Morrell, for sharing this quote on The Writing Life Too.
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Mini Writing Conference in Portland, Oregon

Making It in Tough & Changing Times

A Mini Writing Conference

January 28, 2012

At last, a practical one-day conference crammed with just the information that you need to propel your writing career to the next level and muscle your way to submission. We’ll cover everything from creating potent sentences and writing irresistible query letters that capture attention, to writing killer openers and making a living in a media-saturated world.

Time: 8:30-5:30

Cost: $99 Includes Continental breakfast, catered lunch, workshops and keynote address by author Christina Katz.

Location: Tabor Space, 5441 S.E. Belmont, Portland, OR

Keynote by Christina Katz The Prosperous Writer: Tips For Navigating The Gig Economy


Workshops: One Strong Sentence After Another, Monica Drake; Killer Openers, Jessica Morrell; Anatomy of a Scene, Jessica Morrell; Paring it Down to the Truth, Emily Whitman; What Editors Want, Adam O’Connor Rodriguez.

Panel/Q & A: Risk It To Get Published with Christina Katz, Jessica Morrell, and Adam O’Connor Rodriguez

Click on through to Jessical Morrell's website for all the conference schedule and details, as well as registration information.

Unfortunately, I just scheduled some work that day so I won't be there. Drats. I would if I could!
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Decerebralization - The Timing Couldn't Be Better

The online writing workshop with Inga Muscio, through Ariel Gore's Literary Kitchen, is about to begin. I'm excited to try something new. I will continue with Ariel and it will be lovely. And this timing is perfect for me to take on the challenge that will be Inga's assignments. I just wrote my introduction to the online classroom and will paste it below, rather than starting from scratch. It's taken me quite a while to get my introduction to say what I want it to say.

I will be continuing with the regular Lit Star Training - but was ready for a bit of "shaking up." And what better time than now, when other things have been altered. When I've reached a place in my personal growth of trying to be more subjective (and it is still "trying" at this point; sometimes I still grapple with what that even means - it is so far removed from how I grew up).

Here is the introduction to A Study in Decerebralization with Inga Muscio from the class announcement:

"Thinking is nice. I think we can all agree that thinking is an important part of writing. To write from your heart, however, a lot of the thinking business has to be set aside. How to achieve this when everything we have learned about writing involves thinking? This thinking business also eventually gives you false expectations that you and your writing can probably never live up to.

For everyone who can churn out reportage, no problemo, but struggles with just letting go and belting out some genius from your heart and soul, for everyone with a mean-spirited bitch of an inner editor, for everyone with a so many truckloads of memories that you constantly set aside until they gridlock the byways of your heart, our Study in Decerebralization if for you. "

And my class intro:

I'm Dot and a regular in the regular Kitchen. And I just completed my first two-week intensive with Ariel. And in November completed writing my 4th consecutive NaNoWriMo 50k+ in 30 days. Meaning - I like challenges.

So I look at Inga's questions and as I paste them in here to respond to in a logical way I think: THAT. That is why I'm here.

I'm attracted to this class because I live in my head a lot and "decerebralization" resonated.

There are things in my life pulling me into my body, pulling me to live from the inside outward instead of being constrained by others' expectations or limitations or shoulds. A recent health issue challenged me to be more aware of my physical presence and simultaneously take more cerebral action in terms of test results, treatment options, monitoring certain foods and so on. So "decerebralizing" is what I need right now, what I want, as I practice living more subjectively.     

I've been writing a lot - in spurts between interpreting plays or between regular interpreting jobs or after grading students' work and visits with practitioners. But when I look at my writing - when I look at Ariel's intensive and I look at NaNoWriMo - I have to admit that I write more and I write better when I write more frequently.

So, in an effort to write more often, which to me means taking time away from available freelance and part-time job working hours, I need to shake things up a bit. Reprioritize. Stop overthinking and write more. Let go. Belt it out, yes. Stop trying so hard to do the right thing or be nice or worry if it's enough/good enough/worthy of being read/blahblahblah. Write it. Yes.

That's my goal - to keep writing, write more, and try something new. I love Inga's books and there is a different energy from how I write and I want to try it.

One pasted-in question I will leave, as I need to respond directly *grin.* Are you a practical, logical thinking person [YES] who feels {deeply - I wouldn't say "deeply" exactly} challenged [oh, yeah, mostly positive, edgy challenge] by this class, or is it easy for you to throw caution to the wind [nope - almost never - but I want to be that person] and break free from social barriers [uh, no - not totally, though a little, sometimes *ahem*]?

...oh, and to have delirious fun writing ... I liked that in the description of the class and it was the second hook, right after "decerebralization"...

Grand Canyon 2010; photo JD Sampson

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Another "Best Of..." : Websites With Tools

This was posted on another writer's website. Some useful websites which are not just for writers. And, no, I haven't been through all of "The 101 Most Useful Websites" - but I've glanced at a few.

Here is a sampling from the list:

15.  joliprint.com – reformats news articles and blog content as a newspaper.
17.  e.ggtimer.com – a simple online timer for your daily needs.
72.  sxc.hu – download stock images absolutely free.
78.  sumopaint.com – an excellent layer-based online image editor.
79.  snopes.com – find if that email offer you received is real or just another scam.
100. otixo.com – easily manage your online files on Dropbox, Google Docs, etc.

A few tools to kick of the new year right. And if you have some other favorites you don't see on the list, feel free to share them here.

Hope 2012 is off to a great start for everyone!
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Razor's Edge : New Year, New Opportunities

I postponed the final Razor's Edge for 2011 until Saturday, December 31. The last day of the year - one day.

I'm not going to say to make resolutions. You can if you want. And there are some excellent resources all over the internet and probably with friends and family if you want prompts or a starting place.

Instead, set an intention for the coming year. An intention to go deeper in your relationships. An intention to write with more energy. An intention to be true to your vision and your voice. An intention to feel good. An intention to put yourself first.

And, if you prefer, place one of your characters in a situation where her life will be altered by the events of the evening. Something will happen to give her a new outlook and her future will be changed.

I offer the following music I found on YouTube to listen to as you begin writing: "InTENtion" by My Sleeping Karma.




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Live Storytelling - "I Didn't Think This Through"

Interpreted Live Storytelling Performance

WHAT:   Live Storytelling - The theme is "I Didn't Think This Through"
               by Back Fence PDX
WHEN:   Monday, January 23, 2012 at 7:00 pm
WHERE: Portland Center Stage
COST:    *FREE*

TICKETS: Deaf Community members - you must reserve your tickets by January 9th. All tickets being held for the interpreted section will be released to the general public after January 9th. *note* The general tickets for this event become available at 10am on January 3rd at 10:00 am; except for the interpreted section, the tickets will sell out within 24 hours.

CONTACT: To reserve your interpreted section seat, you must email events@backfencepdx.com by 1/9/12 and say that you need seats in the interpreted section.

INTERPRETERS: Dot Hearn and Steve Nail

DETAILS:  This is a one night only, free performance of storytelling.

The show isn't improv nor specifically comedy. It's a storytelling show a la The Moth and/or This American Life. 6 people will be telling true personal narratives based around the theme, "I Didn't Think This Through." Each story will be between 10 and 15 minutes long. Though the stories are not memorized, we do create an outline with them that they work from. Tellers come from all walks of life, some have performed a lot on stage and others are more regular joes... for this show we have a pet photographer, construction worker, and food cart owner. Stories do largely angle toward being funny, but there are typically some poignant moments mixed with all other types of emotion (gross, scary, weird etc!)—the humor arises out of the narrative. Let's face it, the truth is funny!

This show will have adult content.

Here are links to three of the six storytellers for this special event:
Mary VanNote    http://www.maryvannote.com/
Carli Davidson    http://carlidavidson.photoshelter.com/
Laurie Notaro     http://idiotgirls.com/

Don't Drink & Drive: Transportation Options

One of the major drinking holidays is on the horizon. While I long ago gave up the tradition of starting the new year with a hangover - enjoy it if you do! And - please don't drink and drive.

There are many transportation options when it comes to party time. And New Year's Eve has some added assistance for those who need it.

One, of course, is the tried and true "designated driver." This is a good option.

But sometimes you may find yourself a little more tipsy than you planned and there's no one to drive you home. Or you feel "a slight buzz" and that you'll "be fine." Please - be safe, not just fine. Even a slight buzz alters your reaction time.

Don't wind up the tragic protagonist in my next novel who dies in a fiery car crash because she was just a little tipsy but wasn't able to maneuver that curb.

Be safe. Okay? I'm not saying to not have a good time -- but plan ahead for getting home safely if you're going out. Or plan a sleepover! That can be fun, too.

One program to get you - and your car - home is from AAA. This service is available in most areas:

AAA Tipsy Tow drivers are ready and waiting to assist drivers who are the worse for wear between 6pm New Year's Eve 2011 and 6am New Year's Day 2012.  If you or someone you know over-indulges this New Year's Eve, don't try to navigate the roads on your own -- here's the info on your free ride home this holiday season.

The AAA Tipsy Tow program is running throughout ... a good chunk of the United States, in an effort to keep drunk drivers off the road and accidents down on New Year's Eve.  The AAA Tipsy Tow number is 1-800-222-4357.

Just call in and tell the operators you need a Tipsy Tow.  AAA will drive you and tow your vehicle up to ten miles for free.  You don't have to be an AA member, and you won't have to show any identification.  The AAA tow truck driver will take you, your car, and up to one additional passenger back home -- but they won't take you bar-hopping, or to any other establishment. 

In the Portland (Oregon) metro area, TriMet has some free ride options:

...all bus and MAX rides will be free beginning at 8 p.m. on Dec. 31.

They'll run on regular Saturday schedules, but MAX service will be extended, TriMet spokeswoman Mary Fetsch said.

MAX Blue, Green and Yellow trains will run later into the night, approximately every 35 minutes until about 3 a.m. The last Blue Line trip to Gresham will leave Pioneer Square at 3:06 a.m., and the last trip to Hillsboro will leave Pioneer Square 10 minutes later.

The last Green Line trip to Clackamas will leave the Pioneer Courthouse/Southwest 6th Avenue at 3:10 a.m. The last Yellow Line trip to the Expo Center will leave the same station at 3:02 a.m., and the last trip to downtown will leave the Expo Center station at 2:24 a.m.

A trip to the Rose Quarter Transit Center will leave the Expo Center at 3:42 a.m.

On the Red Line, trains will run on regular Saturday schedules until the end of service and shuttle buses will carry riders between the Gateway Transit Center and Portland International Airport until about 3 a.m. The last trip of the night to PDX will leave Pioneer Square at 10:43 p.m. The last trip to the Beaverton Transit Center will leave the airport at 11:49 p.m.

For a complete list of TriMet's schedules, visit their website.

A Few Thoughts For Today

I know this is a big holiday for many people. For me, this is one holiday near the middle of the season with a concentration on holidays. Not that I celebrate them all - I don't. But I understand the importance of the time for reflection, for looking ahead, for setting aside time for family and friend, faith and community; for being present.

And so - wishing everyone the best of this season of noticing, no matter which flavor of holiday you celebrate.

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"A man's life is nothing but an extended trek through the detours of art to recapture those one or two moments when his heart first opened." by Albert Camus

~ not to be picky, but I was going to make it gender neutral, but that's not what he said .. but we know this applies to women, too ~

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In the Jan/Feb 2012 Poets & Writers, Arnie Cooper quotes from Milan Kundera' book, "Slowness" : "Speed is the form of ecstasy the technological revolution has bestowed on man.". ~ again, with the "man" thing ~

Cooper adds that "...our addiction to speed ... disconnects us from our true selves."

The title of his article is "In This Moment - Slowing Down to Open Up the Writer's Mind."

I like his analogy of calligraphy, by hand or by computer. Slowing down. Being present. Making time and space for creativity to happen.

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In P&W (same issue as above) there is an exercise in the bottom left corner on pg 58. This is from their online poetry and prose prompts, which can be found at www.pw.org/writing-prompts-exercises.

This one is ... The Time Is Now ... instructions for writing a collaborative poem with a friend. (I think this is similar to what a friend, Rooze, has done a couple of times on Facebook.)

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Take some time today to Be in your life. Let life in and experience creativity.

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Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Halfway

Last Saturday the online writing Intensive with Ariel started. Since then I have written nine stories ranging between 900 to 1800 words. I have posted at least one story each day - two last Sunday; and I have an extra story which I didn't end up using of about 1500 words tucked away on my computer. That unused story isn't finished because other stories surfaced which better fit the assignments and the unfinished story was going to be too long for either one.

I just looked at my posts, thinking I'd missed a couple of days and saw that I haven't posted anything since Monday. Now it's Friday. And tomorrow the Intensive will be halfway done.

The middle of this week was Solstice. A time to look ahead to the coming year, to envision hopes and desires as the sun turns and we will begin climbing back to the light. Although this week has been especially mild and unusually sunny for December in Portland. I'm not complaining - just taking note that it has been dryer and more sunny than normal; although I do see on the current forecast that we are into a rainy period starting on Sunday.

So - the Solstice. Rejoice, rebirth, renewal - and visioning.

For me, this was a commitment to live my life from the inside outward. If you haven't been with me on this recent journey that may not make sense. But it's about living my life - not the one imposed on me or to meet the expectations from outside. It's about being present in my life and in my heart and soul and living from there and being in the world, from my experience.

It will include more regular writing, submitting more of my writing, using Ariel's editing and feedback on the memoir to revise it and then getting more feedback and advice and editing until it's ready to sail out into the world. It will include opening up my writing even more - taking risks, not censoring (although I've already made great strides in that), being bold and brave in my writing.

My vision includes more time to be inspired - which may mean staying in my pjs all day or going for a leisurely stroll or going to dinner & a play I'm not interpreting or reading. Or sleeping.

This vision definitely includes some time to be. To simply be or to be simple. Do nothing or whatever happens in the moment.

And to "Trust the Process."

Friend Rooze took a great picture not too long ago: a medium blue background with those words in white. She posted it on Facebook for her BFA Goddard cohort and there was some specific significance for them. I wasn't a part of that cohort but I know and need those words. Those are words for my creativity, my writing - my life right now. Trust the Process. I don't know where that picture was taken and it doesn't matter. But I do know that I downloaded that picture and it's my current laptop wallpaper - tiled: the picture fits on my  screen basically four times. Repetition can be a good thing.

Half way through the Intensive, half a week from the Solstice (I know it's Christmas Eve, too). And there was another "half" I was going to mention but I've forgotten. And I'll take that as a cue to go to bed.

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